Free Delivery if you order Begging Your Pardon by 5th December!

The big day has arrived! Begging Your Pardon is now available on Amazon and this week only there is free delivery. So get those Christmas orders in now!

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From 29th November to 5th December, all Amazon customers can enjoy free standard delivery, with no minimum purchase amount, when they use promotional code FREEDELIVERY at checkout. The promotion applies to all items listed as “dispatched” or “fulfilled” by Amazon on the product detail page and is available for millions of items with no minimum order amount, including top gift ideas like toys and electronics, as well as home items, fashion and more. The promotional code can be used multiple times throughout the Free Delivery Week promotion. 

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Order your copy of  Begging Your Pardon now.

Now available on Amazon.

Changing Poets at Buckingham Palace

From an original by A.A. Milne:

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Carol Ann Duffy’s passing the chalice

Ten years service enough for one bard.

“A poet’s life is terrible hard,”

Says Alice.

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Andrew Green went down with Alice.

We saw a guard in a sentry-box.

“They’re guarding all the poetry books”

Says Alice.

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Andrew Green went down with Alice.

We looked for the Queen but she never came.

“Just write her a poem all the same,”

Says Alice.

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Andrew Green went down with Alice.

They’ve great big parties inside the grounds.

“I wouldn’t be Queen for a hundred pounds,”

Says Alice.

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Andrew Green went down with Alice.

A face looked out, but it wasn’t the Queen’s

“She’s much too busy a-signing things,”

Says Alice.

They’re changing poets at Buckingham Palace –

Andrew Green went down with Alice.

“Do you think the Queen knows all about me?”

“Sure to, dear, but it’s time for tea,”

Says Alice.

Begging Your Pardon – Please Can I Be Laureate? – coming Friday 30th November. Available for pre order on Amazon now.

Ready to go!

I’m pleased to announce that Begging Your Pardon, my tongue in cheek bid to be considered the UK’s next Poet Laureate, is ready for release. The kindle version of ‘Begging Your Pardon – Please  Can I Be Laureate?’ is available for pre order on Amazon.com or Amazon.uk now. The paperback version will be available Friday 30th November just in time for Christmas.

Andrew Green’s new book Begging Your Pardon - Please Can I Be Laureate?
Begging Your Pardon – Please Can I Be Laureate is now available on Amazon.

Begging Your Pardon – is a humorous collection of royal poems pushing the merits of a local poet who could pop round with a poem whenever the occasion demands it. 

The current Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy is standing down at the end of her ten year stint and a distinguished committee will be making recommendations for a new Laureate to be appointed in May. Some better known poets have made clear they don’t wish to be considered and have even called for the post to be abolished but I am available and willing and would aim to bring a lighter touch to the role. 

I won’t be too disappointed if they go for someone else. My poems are more fun than to be taken seriously; affectionate but slightly irreverent. There’s a fantasy view of a Windsor where locals regularly bump shoulders with the royals,  a wry look at royal life, such as what happens when they forget to take down the flag and an increasingly desperate correspondence about the Laureate role.

I have been writing poetry for a number of years and won a local competition for my riposte to Sir John Betjeman, ‘Living Breathing Slough’. I mostly writes online and two of my collections have been featured on Wattpad where they have had more than 100,000 reads. My first published work Margaret’s Story was a biography of his mother in verse.




Hip Op

CEEDF698-B284-4218-A6D5-A7BC534B13C8Listen up youth to what I’m sayin’
Cos I’m long in the tooth and I ain’t playin’.
Got a gammy knee been pensioned off
I ain’t Hip Hop more like hip op.
A burden on the NHS
Wastin’ my time with guff like this.

Get me a stair lift, zimmer frame
Too old n’ stiff for party time
Kind of past it – know what I mean?’
‘Get Down with tha youth’ just ain’t my scene.
Hate Hip Hop – am more into tunes
Dodgey dad dancing – playin’ the goon.

Kind of tiresome getting old
Past your bed time, feeling cold.
Shuffle off grandad, had your day
No one’s listnin’ to what you say.
Can’t quite cut it any more
Legs are tired and feet are sore.

Listen up youth it’s comin’ to you
Ain’t gonna tell you what to do.
Just make the most of what you got
Got your youth, got your health, you got the lot.
Past my prime, the ‘best before’ date.
Get the most out of life before it’s too late.

Done it my way, now try yours
Creepn’ outta here on all fours.
Spun around some, done my bit
Good while it lasted, guess that’s it
Exit left, don’t need no applause
Done my stuff, stage is all yours.