What food would you say is your specialty?
My speciality‘s messing up
I’ve done it once again!
Yet again I spoiled the bread
I thought I‘d added yeast.
It doesn’t look as if I did
Or maybe not enough.
It’s getting well beyond a joke
I know my wife won’t laugh!
I make mistakes,
keep losing things
I think I always have
But worryingly
It’s getting worse
I’m not right in my head.
What major historical events do you remember?
So much to remember
Where do I begin?
Perhaps with John F. Kennedy
The day they did him in.
Or a small step for an astronaut
A leap for all mankind
Armstrong was the first of us
To step upon the moon.
Years of IRA bombing
Terrorist attacks
Bombs in Guildford, Aldershot
Brought it close to home.
Then there’s Margaret Thatcher
The cow that gave no milk
A war with Argentina
She took the Falklands back.
They released Mandela
A great man was set free
Achieved their independence
And did it peacefully.
In eighty nine the Berlin Wall
Came finally tumbling down
We never thought we’d see that
But that’s what happened then.
Then there’s 9/11
How could we forget?
Aircraft striking those twin towers
While we watched horror struck.
Then of course there’s COVID
The bug that changed our world.
Surely we imagined that?
Have I remembered wrong?
What’s the biggest risk you’d like to take — but haven’t been able to?
A big risk means
the odds are stacked
It’s likely that you’ll lose.
Why would I ever
‘like to take’
a stupid risk like that?
The biggest thing
that’s stopping me?
It’s not a good idea.
I’ll only ever gamble if
I can afford to lose.
What are you most proud of in your life?
I’m proud to still be active
And getting on with life
And not like other folk my age
Who just complain and ache.
I’m lucky to be healthy
And grateful that I am
But have to say I work at it
And exercise a lot.
I’m actually working harder
Than when I was at work
I get outside in good fresh air.
I’m not stuck at a desk.
I’m not just staring at a screen
I’m busy growing food
Or working in the garden
My fingers in the soil.
I’m proud to know I’m fitter
Than most folk of my age
And proud of beating younger folk
When I am in a race.
I like to get out travelling
To see more of the world
I’ll have visited six continents
Before next year is out.
I won’t give in and sit at home
So much I want to do
I’m very proud of my Jetpack streak
And poems everyday.
I know I’ve had three score and ten
And that can be your lot
But will carry on as long as I can
Enjoy all life can give.
What have you been working on?
My work is highly secret
I can’t say what it is.
I’m deeply undercover
Hiding in plain sight.
I’ve given lots of hints on here
But they were just false trails
To lead you up the garden path
And put you off the scent.
I am like a chrysalis
I am not what I seem
One day I will spring to life
And you will be surprised.
You need to watch me closely
I suggest you should subscribe.
Focus on my every move
Guess what I’ll do next.
I can not blow my cover
So it depends on you
Watch me closely
Up your guard
Follow me on here.
What’s something most people don’t know about you?
I’ve run the race a few times
Of course I’ve never won!
But strangely first to cross the line
Is something I can claim.
The race I want to tell you of
Was nineteen ninety three
Eamon Martin won it
So he’s famouser than me.
I didn’t run the race that year
Was only helping out.
They started twenty five thousand
So needed lots of help.
We were finish marshalls
Stationed on the bridge.
In the days before the chip
Complicated stuff.
The runners all had bar codes
The ‘pluckers’ would strip off.
Put a hand upon a chest
And gently rip it off.
Then there’d be the ‘spindlers‘
Who put them on big spools
Then they’d be collected
And matched up with the watch.
So the pluckers and the spindlers
Had their different jobs
But we were ‘separators’
What would be our task?
We took them through the funnels
We’d each take through a batch
Get them to the pluckers
Who’d rip the bar codes off.
We’d hand over our batch card
And then go running back
‘Well done, well done,keep moving’
Was what we’d always shout.
A complicated business
We had to get it right
So of course we’d practice
Which is where I made my mark.
Before the race was started
We had a quick run through
So all the separators
jogged towards the line.
I was first to get there
So hand on heart can say
That year’s London Marathon.
I was first across the line.
Do lazy days make you feel rested or unproductive?
‘Lazy’, ‘idle’, ‘work shy‘
Such pejorative words!
They imply that taking a break
Means you are one to shirk!
I’d rather call them ‘rest days’
I’ll take less exercise
But doesn’t mean I’ll laze around
There’s other stuff to do.
Often it’s a ‘rest day’
Cos there’s no time to run
But they are often busy days
With plenty else to do.
Maybe there’s the odd day
When we’ll just hang around.
We all occasionally need a rest
To help us carry on.
But calling it a ‘lazy day’
Won’t appeal to me
Life’s too short.
How long is left?
I’d rather be active me.
As to being ‘productive‘
I’ve given up on ‘work‘
No more pushing paper around
We’re just producing food.
When you think of the word “successful,” who’s the first person that comes to mind and why?
I seldom think ‘successful’
It’s not a word I’d use.
We never get to where we want
There’s always more to do.
If you’re good at what you do
It leads to better jobs
But being good at something else
Won’t make you good at that.
We rise till we’re incompetent
Can’t really do the job
Leaders overstretch themselves
And struggle at the top.
Just look at the responses
You’ll struggle to find names.
So many say themselves or ‘mum’
But is ‘success’ the word?
Or else they mention Elon Musk
Perhaps he proves my point?
A man whose done so very much
But overstretched himself.
Have you looked at Twitter
Or what he now calls X?
He’s dragged it to the gutter
And you call that success?
What makes a good neighbour?
We have the best of neighbours
We couldn’t ask for more.
I can’t imagine better ones
Than those we have next door.
They‘ll water all our garden plants
Whenever we’re away.
We have a lot, so quite a task
And yet they won’t complain.
They’ll put the dustbins in and out
They’ll park cars on our drive
So it’ll look to passers by
That someone’s staying there.
Sometimes when we‘ve been away
They’ll offer us a meal
Really very kind of them
When we‘re travel tired.
Once we had a Heron
Come and raid our pond.
Our dear neighbours secretly
Popped in five new fish.
We will oftentimes to theirs
Or they’ll come round to ours
Or maybe we‘ll meet up to eat
At another place.
There always up for giving lifts
Have even offered cars
They‘ve lent us equipment
They sometimes borrow ours.
They take fantastic pictures
We share a love of birds.
We get a calendar each year
With glorious garden scenes.
At Christmas their‘s a party
They invite more neighbours round
We‘ll all join in with Christmas songs
And conga neighbours home.
They are always there for us
But also so discreet.
They won’t invade our privacy
But offer when we need.
What could you try for the first time?
Maybe learn the tango
like an Argentine
We‘re off to Argentina
and I know my wife is keen.
I’ve tried most stuff I wanted to
And often on my own
But dancing as a couple
Is not my kind of thing.
I like to dance, I’ll jump about
Dad dance to extreme
But tell me where to put my feet
And I am all at sea.
It’s not a dance I’m keen to try
It wouldn’t be for me
But I should try to please my wife
And not act selfishly.
My hobbies are quite solitary
To run or else to write
We do stuff in the garden
But I’m mostly labour there.
So learn to dance together
Proper ballroom stuff
Not what appeals to me
But I should try for her.
It is a little scarey
Poor memory, two left feet
But you can’t learn unless you try
Perhaps it’s time I did.
Andrew Green's Poems 